Miles and Moments_20250322

This month has been a whirlwind of events. The previous tenant ended our contract, prompting us to search for a replacement. Fortunately, I found a suitable tenant—thanks to the power of the internet, which made communication between Belgium and Shanghai much easier. With my mom and sister’s support, the transition was swift and smooth.

Emotionally, it has been a rollercoaster. I celebrated my best friend’s delivery from afar, unable to be there with her. I missed another dear friend’s wedding, a once-in-a-lifetime moment I wish I could have attended. A close colleague’s family struggles weighed on me, and I found myself grappling with a nagging sense of inadequacy compared to my master student. I deeply missed my husband, felt the sting of betrayal from someone I once called a good friend, and endured persistent dizziness, fearing I had been poisoned by chemical exposure. As if that weren’t enough, a viral infection left my right eye red and swollen.

Writing all of this down feels strangely fascinating. There were moments when I wanted to escape—to leave everything behind. I longed to be held by my mother, the way she cradles my little niece with such warmth and tenderness. But over time, I’ve come to realize that I am my own constant—the one person who will always be with me and truly understand me.

Over the years, I’ve grown more emotionally resilient. Yet, I still find myself easily affected by a single sentence or a fleeting glance from others. The good news is that I’m beginning to understand myself more deeply. I’m learning how to regulate my emotions, practicing mindfulness, and meditating to process my thoughts and feelings.

Step by step, I tackle each challenge, and with every problem I solve, I feel a little stronger. Through it all, I’m grateful to have kind and supportive people around me—my husband, my family, my supervisor, my master student, my colleagues, and my lifelong friends. What more could I ask for?

Giving is always more fulfilling than receiving. I hope to cultivate the strength to enrich myself while also sharing what I have with others—to become a better version of myself.

It rained today, but I still went for a run with my hat on. As always, the air was fresh, and running never let me down. Thanks for all I have.